Writing is a subject that I tend to find comparable to studying a rock in terms of joy and excitement. In other words it is not my subject of choice and I would much rather deal with numbers and equations or analyze the structure of our economy or something along those lines. However, over the course of writing 101 this quarter, I feel I have accomplished a lot as a writer. I have improved upon many of my essential skills as a writer and discovered what areas of writing I consider my strengths. Also, through completing the various assigned papers I have come to realize the areas of writing in which I am weaker and need to improve upon. The following portfolio contains two of the papers that I have written this quarter. These papers are basically exhibitions of my strengths and weaknesses as a writer I mentioned above. In addition, the editing and revisions I have made to these papers, some of which are contained in this letter, provide examples of how my writing skills have improved.
Seeing as how writing is not my favorite subject, there are some obvious areas within the necessary skills of writing that I feel I have plenty of room to improve in. One that I particularly notice is that I need to improve on my transitions from paragraph to paragraph. For example, in my essay "From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism", I end my first body paragraph which suggests that a hero is someone who will do anything for their fellow man with this sentence: “If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.” The following paragraph brings up my next point that a hero must be able to make quick, smart decisions on the spot, and begins with the sentence: “A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations.” My transition is not only weak, but practically non-existent. I have since added a transitional sentence in between these two, which reads: “The quality of sacrifice found within a hero might be matched only by their need for sound, on the spot judgment.” The addition of this sentence provides a link between the two paragraphs rather than abruptly switching from one point to the next. Another small, yet relevant attribute of writing I find myself stumbling over from time to time is when to use a comma, and when to use a semi-colon. This is an issue I have noticed common amongst my peers as well. More often than not, I find myself just going with a comma, probably because that is what is more familiar to me. For example, in my essay “Online Social Networking: Foundation for a New Set of Issues “, I had originally written a sentence as follows: “The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty, these acts would have never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site.” After rereading this sentence, I realized that use of a semi-colon in place of the comma was actually the correct way to write it. I made this change and found myself making many similar changes throughout my papers. Although there is endless room for improvement in my skills as a writer, I feel that I have already strongly developed some of these essential skills.
Throughout my years of writing, I have noticed that there are certain areas in which I consistently exhibit proficiency. Varying sentence structure and length is something I feel that I do very well in my papers. A paper that drones on and on with sentences that are all the same length and structure becomes very dull and boring and results in a paper that is torture on the brain of the reader. As a writer, it is one hundred percent essential to mix long, short, and in between length sentences within paragraphs. Along with this, varying the structure/type of sentence is also essential in creating a more readable paper. This involves using a combination of compound sentences, short powerful statements, rhetorical questions, vivid descriptions, etc. My strength in this area of writing is apparent throughout my second essay. The fifth paragraph, for example, contains sentences from a multiple of varieties. I use a sentence that describes bombs exploding and gunshots ringing through the air which is preceded by a very short and straight forward, six word sentence, yet followed by a longer, compound sentences. Shortly following I pose a question to the reader and use the next couple sentences to explain my answer to that question. It is that sort of sentence variation that creates an interesting paper to read, and one that does not become monotonous to the reader. Another key element vital to creating an attention grabbing paper is having voice. I feel my writing voice, particularly throughout this quarter in writing 101, has come a long way. I started out just writing the words that I felt would address the assigned topic for our classes’ papers, yet they seemed to lack my personality and did not really sound like me. However, I have recently put extra effort into adding in my voice in my papers and I feel the effort has paid off. This is especially apparent in my most recent paper. For this paper I chose a topic that is relevant to me and my peers. Writing about a familiar subject on which I have plenty of thoughts and opinions on such as social networking sites really allowed me to speak freely; expressing my ideas how they would sound if I were to be conversing with someone in real life. I would almost venture to say that I enjoyed reading articles related to the effects of social networking sites and responding to them with my own personal input; and that is saying something.
Despite the fact that writing is far from my subject of choice, I have put a lot of effort into improving myself as a writer this quarter. Not only have I tried to develop the areas in writing that needed it most, but I have put time into further increasing the areas in which I already had solid skills as well. Within this portfolio are the fruits of my labor: two assigned papers and my final exam. I only hope to entertain the reader and possibly teach them something new or cause them to view the subject matter from a different point of view.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Essay of Choice (Essay #2)
"From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism"
There he stood. Sweat dripping down his forehead as his eyes aimed through the sights of his rifle, squinting to enable him to see through the blaring desert sun. The enemy came within range, and the hero did what he had to: He put a bullet right in the chest of that twelve year old boy.
At first glance, that story might seem repulsive and to entitle that man as a ‘hero’ would sound far from right. Mikah King is both a hero and great friend of mine, and that is one of the many stories he has shared with me. The word ‘hero’ to me defines someone who puts others above themselves, and can react quickly, making a smart decision when thrown into tough situations. In light of this, the people who first come to mind when I think of heroes are the men and women of the United States armed services. Mikah has been in the navy for over two and a half years now, and has displayed brilliant acts of courage and strength. He always puts his comrades above himself, and is quick and bright enough to survive in the modern warfare of our age. For these reasons I am proud to call Mikah my friend, and hero.
To fully appreciate Mikah’s heroism, I believe it’s necessary to first learn about his past. Before he first left for boot camp a couple years ago, Mikah was a completely different person than he is now. He was into some unhealthy habits related to drug use and not enrolled in school of any sort. I won’t be any more specific about the drug abuse out of respect for my friend, but basically he was setting himself up to fail and did not seem to either realize, or care. Then, quite out of the blue really, I come to find out that Mikah had joined the Navy, and already had a date for departure to San Diego, California where he would begin training. Talk about taking a huge step in the right direction. He had chosen to get off the path of darkness which led to certain failure. Gun-shots, grenades, explosions, and all those other wonderful perkswez that come with the military life wouldn’t exactly be a walk in the park, but Mikah knew that when he signed up. He is a tough guy, and finding out what he would be doing with his life made me proud to be his friend. This was when Mikah first started to form into the mold of a ‘hero’ in my eyes.
As a member of the US Navy, Mikah is a soldier who would do anything for his fellow man. He recently came back for a 10 day break and had countless stories to tell of intense combat situations where many lives were at stake. He told me of a time where him and his team were stationed in Fallujah, Iraq, where one must always be alert and ready for action. He was wearing his bullet-proof flak jacket when suddenly a gun shot rang out and whizzed right past one of his fellow soldiers. Putting his friend’s life above his own, Mikah grabbed him by the collar of his jacket and desperately yanked him downward, throwing him to the ground just in time to save him from the next bullet. However, in return Mikah took that bullet himself, directly to the right side of the chest. The blow, which he described felt like unsuspectingly taking a full force knockout punch from Mike Tyson, instantly knocked the wind out of Mikah and put him on his ass for a few seconds. Lucky for Mikah he was wearing that flak jacket, for its without a doubt a better alternative to be winded for a few seconds, than dead forever. This brave act to me makes my classification of Mikah as a hero irrefutable. If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.
A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations. The story in the beginning of this essay greatly exemplifies Mikah’s ability to do this. Although one’s initial thoughts after hearing he shot and killed a boy who was merely twelve years old might be somewhere along the lines of, ‘wow, this guy is a sick bastard’, I assure you, he is not. Out in the desert things are different. Bombs explode and shots ring out from weapons of all sorts on a daily basis. The war concept of kill or be killed doesn’t discriminate against age, and when a little boy who isn’t even old enough to be in high school but can shoot an AK-47 is coming at you, it is sad what has to be done. However it takes a true hero to be able to make the right choice, which in this case was to shoot down the Iraqi insurgent despite his age. What could have happened had Mikah hesitated? He or his fellow comrade’s could have been injured, or even killed. For crucial circumstances bring with them crucial consequences, therefore a hero must be able to react quickly and with sound judgment in these situations and make a choice that will result in the most optimum outcome. That person is Mikah.
Before leaving for the Navy, Mikah was a good friend of mine, but far from a hero. Now that he has those experiences and all that he went though, and has shared with me those stories of courage and sacrifice; I now view him with new eyes; He is a changed man. And in no way was any of the change negative. He has gone from essentially a nobody with no potential, to a soldier; From someone looked down upon by most to a man who now has the respect of nearly everyone in this country; From my good friend Mikah, to my great friend, as well as hero, Mikah King: proud member of the US Navy.
ESSAY 4
Online Social Networking: Foundation for a New Set of Issues
Teens, adults, and everyone in between flock to social networking sites like new age flies to electronic feces. Sites such as Myspace and Facebook have grown exponentially since they have been created; gaining thousands of new users every day. Following cell phones and email, these websites were quickly becoming the next step to the future of social networking. This new technology has allowed people to make many new “friends” in a short amount of time, while also keeping in contact with old ones. However, social networking websites are slowly diminishing many vital aspects of today’s society, and its social skills. Most importantly, seemingly friendly websites like Twitter, and Friendster have built the foundation for the new age “cyber bully”, as well as creating many problems pertaining to privacy and personal security.
Let’s investigate the world of online social networking from the bottom up, following the unveiling of these websites through the eyes of a high school parent. The parent explores the idea with a panel of five and finds they are a means of personal expression and getting attention for students and parents alike. A student that was a part of this discussion adds that he prefers online social networking to face to face interaction because “it’s not as demanding,” and he has time to think in between responses. Researchers at the MacArthur foundation claim that children are protected and their personal information “is considered as off-limits to adults as a locked diary.” Though this article tells the audience about many positive aspects of online communication and social networking, they don’t leave out the fact that “parents have legitimate concerns when it comes to the dark side of online interaction, including bullying and cyber security issues. Many also worry their children don't fully grasp how the content they post online can be viewed by future employers.”
These websites are clearly a hit with the younger audience, as getting attention and personal expression are desired by growing teenagers. But the claim that children’s personal web pages are inaccessible by adults, predators, and bullies alike is a false sense of security. I know from personal experience that all members of Myspace have full control over their privacy settings. If a child chooses to, their personal information may be available to anyone who decides to browse it. Not only this, but messages may be sent to users even if their privacy settings are set to block out strangers. With positives come negatives, and its clear that within the millions of members on these websites, some users will use them as tools for mischief. It is now apparent that social networking sites are very popular with today’s generation, but could there be some dangers involved?
“One in five children falls victim to the cyber bullies” is a newspaper article that elaborates on the fact that online social networking is not always fun and games. A study was done by T-Mobile that “asked 3,000 11-16 year olds across the country if they had received bullying text messages and emails.” The results were unfortunate, showing that “Of those questioned, 46 per cent said the messages made them feel threatened and a further 44 per cent were embarrassed to have been victimised.” Verbal attacks from “hi-tech predators” didn’t just end at name calling. The article states that bullies have been known to go as far as posting degrading videos on public sites like YouTube, according to the YouGov poll. One might assume that this type of crude and demeaning behavior is aimed only towards younger victims. However, a different study also concluded that “one-fifth of all teachers north of the Border claimed they had suffered abuse from pupils via websites or mobile phones,” and “Some staff also reported that their faces had been superimposed onto pornographic images which were then posted on the internet.” These statistics go to show the new, horrible forms of social terrorism bullys are capable of due to the increasing popularity and constant use of social networking sites by people today. On the bright side, the findings in these studies have birthed a new internet and texting service called “TxtUp StandUp” which will allow for students or victims of online bullies to give and get advice through text messages or online.
The previous article reaffirmed some of my thoughts about online social networking while teaching me about other downfalls of them. We all hear about sexual predators that prey on young children through online chat rooms, however, it seems little attention has been paid to smaller scale issues such as online bullies which can also make a substantial negative impact on a person’s morale, reputation, and self image. The fact that twenty percent of children fall victim to this unethical behavior says a lot about the often unmentioned, darker aspects of online networking. If a student is bullied at school, he/she knows who is verbally attacking them, and can take the proper steps to stop the attacker from repeating that behavior. However, the security and anonymity available to anyone online can empower the bully, while weakening his targets ability to protect themselves from the verbal or visual attacks. Being bullied at school with the security of teachers around and the ability to get help from an authority almost right away seems like heaven compared to the possibility of seeing a demeaning video of oneself posted on Youtube by an anonymous account. I think that technology and social networking sites have simply given bullies another medium of picking on their peers.
The article, “With friends like these . . .,” deals with common online situations and how they should be handled appropriately on the web, and sometimes in real life. The first situation poses the hypothetical situation of one’s boss wanting to add them on Facebook. Two experts, “Anna Post, the great-great-granddaughter of manners guru Emily Post, is an author and associate with the Emily Post Institute, she specializes in 21st-century etiquette,” and Connie Reece, “one of 25 recent American-Statesman Texas Social Media Award Winners, is the founder of Every Dot Connects, an Austin social media company,” give their advice on how to act in these often tricky situations. “Connie Reece: If you're uncomfortable with it, don't add him. If he brings it to your attention, reply that you use that network solely for personal, not professional, relationships. Remember that if your Twitter account is public, your boss can follow and read your "tweets" without your reciprocating. Think twice before venting about work; once you hit "send," you can't take your words back. On Facebook, you can sort friends into groups that you create, and you can set privacy controls accordingly.” Another situation mentioned in the article talks about friends posting unflattering photos of one in a group. The expertise given from Anna and Connie advises that you politely ask your friend to take the photo down if it makes you uncomfortable or is considered cyber-bullying. Connie also adds, “if you were having a bad hair day or your smile was encased in three yards of metal, then suck it up. We all looked like dorks in high school.”
“Suck it up” sounds like some harsh advice coming from an owner of an Austin social media company. The problem here is, a victim of cyber-bullying has essentially no control over what crude comments, pictures, or videos are posted on the web concerning them. Sure, a good friend will have no problem deleting a bad picture of you from their Facebook photo album, but a bully will be filled with glee as their victim hopelessly begs them to delete a demeaning or private picture posted to Myspace or Facebook from a quickly composed, new, and anonymous account. Reconsider the first situation stated in the previous article. Hypothetically speaking, a college student’s boss added him/her on Facebook, only to find incriminating photos of that individual at a party, surrounded by other students drinking. The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty; these acts would have otherwise never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site. Keeping in touch with old friends is great, but once text or visual media posted online interferes with someone’s real personal or professional life, a line is being crossed.
Online social networking sites do offer a chance for people to make new connections, and maintain current ones, but the negative aspects outweigh the positive in a few important areas. Through my research, I have concluded that parents of the younger users of social networking websites should closely monitor their children’s use and conduct online. Important private information may be used against a user; they are prone to verbal or visual attacks by cyber bullies, and the use of the website may interfere with the user’s security in real life.
Bibliography
Jane Simpson."One in five children falls victim to the cyber bullies [Scot Region]. " Mail on Sunday [London (UK)] 15 Mar. 2009,15. ProQuest Newsstand. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 15 Mar. 2009
Omar L. Gallaga."With friends like these . . . " Austin American Statesman [Austin, Tex.] 14 Mar. 2009,F.1. ProQuest Newsstand. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 16 Mar. 2009
Wailin Wong. . "Social media another facet of teens' lives. " Chicago Tribune [Chicago, Ill.] 12 Feb. 2009,1.25. Chicago Tribune. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 10 Mar. 2009
Teens, adults, and everyone in between flock to social networking sites like new age flies to electronic feces. Sites such as Myspace and Facebook have grown exponentially since they have been created; gaining thousands of new users every day. Following cell phones and email, these websites were quickly becoming the next step to the future of social networking. This new technology has allowed people to make many new “friends” in a short amount of time, while also keeping in contact with old ones. However, social networking websites are slowly diminishing many vital aspects of today’s society, and its social skills. Most importantly, seemingly friendly websites like Twitter, and Friendster have built the foundation for the new age “cyber bully”, as well as creating many problems pertaining to privacy and personal security.
Let’s investigate the world of online social networking from the bottom up, following the unveiling of these websites through the eyes of a high school parent. The parent explores the idea with a panel of five and finds they are a means of personal expression and getting attention for students and parents alike. A student that was a part of this discussion adds that he prefers online social networking to face to face interaction because “it’s not as demanding,” and he has time to think in between responses. Researchers at the MacArthur foundation claim that children are protected and their personal information “is considered as off-limits to adults as a locked diary.” Though this article tells the audience about many positive aspects of online communication and social networking, they don’t leave out the fact that “parents have legitimate concerns when it comes to the dark side of online interaction, including bullying and cyber security issues. Many also worry their children don't fully grasp how the content they post online can be viewed by future employers.”
These websites are clearly a hit with the younger audience, as getting attention and personal expression are desired by growing teenagers. But the claim that children’s personal web pages are inaccessible by adults, predators, and bullies alike is a false sense of security. I know from personal experience that all members of Myspace have full control over their privacy settings. If a child chooses to, their personal information may be available to anyone who decides to browse it. Not only this, but messages may be sent to users even if their privacy settings are set to block out strangers. With positives come negatives, and its clear that within the millions of members on these websites, some users will use them as tools for mischief. It is now apparent that social networking sites are very popular with today’s generation, but could there be some dangers involved?
“One in five children falls victim to the cyber bullies” is a newspaper article that elaborates on the fact that online social networking is not always fun and games. A study was done by T-Mobile that “asked 3,000 11-16 year olds across the country if they had received bullying text messages and emails.” The results were unfortunate, showing that “Of those questioned, 46 per cent said the messages made them feel threatened and a further 44 per cent were embarrassed to have been victimised.” Verbal attacks from “hi-tech predators” didn’t just end at name calling. The article states that bullies have been known to go as far as posting degrading videos on public sites like YouTube, according to the YouGov poll. One might assume that this type of crude and demeaning behavior is aimed only towards younger victims. However, a different study also concluded that “one-fifth of all teachers north of the Border claimed they had suffered abuse from pupils via websites or mobile phones,” and “Some staff also reported that their faces had been superimposed onto pornographic images which were then posted on the internet.” These statistics go to show the new, horrible forms of social terrorism bullys are capable of due to the increasing popularity and constant use of social networking sites by people today. On the bright side, the findings in these studies have birthed a new internet and texting service called “TxtUp StandUp” which will allow for students or victims of online bullies to give and get advice through text messages or online.
The previous article reaffirmed some of my thoughts about online social networking while teaching me about other downfalls of them. We all hear about sexual predators that prey on young children through online chat rooms, however, it seems little attention has been paid to smaller scale issues such as online bullies which can also make a substantial negative impact on a person’s morale, reputation, and self image. The fact that twenty percent of children fall victim to this unethical behavior says a lot about the often unmentioned, darker aspects of online networking. If a student is bullied at school, he/she knows who is verbally attacking them, and can take the proper steps to stop the attacker from repeating that behavior. However, the security and anonymity available to anyone online can empower the bully, while weakening his targets ability to protect themselves from the verbal or visual attacks. Being bullied at school with the security of teachers around and the ability to get help from an authority almost right away seems like heaven compared to the possibility of seeing a demeaning video of oneself posted on Youtube by an anonymous account. I think that technology and social networking sites have simply given bullies another medium of picking on their peers.
The article, “With friends like these . . .,” deals with common online situations and how they should be handled appropriately on the web, and sometimes in real life. The first situation poses the hypothetical situation of one’s boss wanting to add them on Facebook. Two experts, “Anna Post, the great-great-granddaughter of manners guru Emily Post, is an author and associate with the Emily Post Institute, she specializes in 21st-century etiquette,” and Connie Reece, “one of 25 recent American-Statesman Texas Social Media Award Winners, is the founder of Every Dot Connects, an Austin social media company,” give their advice on how to act in these often tricky situations. “Connie Reece: If you're uncomfortable with it, don't add him. If he brings it to your attention, reply that you use that network solely for personal, not professional, relationships. Remember that if your Twitter account is public, your boss can follow and read your "tweets" without your reciprocating. Think twice before venting about work; once you hit "send," you can't take your words back. On Facebook, you can sort friends into groups that you create, and you can set privacy controls accordingly.” Another situation mentioned in the article talks about friends posting unflattering photos of one in a group. The expertise given from Anna and Connie advises that you politely ask your friend to take the photo down if it makes you uncomfortable or is considered cyber-bullying. Connie also adds, “if you were having a bad hair day or your smile was encased in three yards of metal, then suck it up. We all looked like dorks in high school.”
“Suck it up” sounds like some harsh advice coming from an owner of an Austin social media company. The problem here is, a victim of cyber-bullying has essentially no control over what crude comments, pictures, or videos are posted on the web concerning them. Sure, a good friend will have no problem deleting a bad picture of you from their Facebook photo album, but a bully will be filled with glee as their victim hopelessly begs them to delete a demeaning or private picture posted to Myspace or Facebook from a quickly composed, new, and anonymous account. Reconsider the first situation stated in the previous article. Hypothetically speaking, a college student’s boss added him/her on Facebook, only to find incriminating photos of that individual at a party, surrounded by other students drinking. The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty; these acts would have otherwise never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site. Keeping in touch with old friends is great, but once text or visual media posted online interferes with someone’s real personal or professional life, a line is being crossed.
Online social networking sites do offer a chance for people to make new connections, and maintain current ones, but the negative aspects outweigh the positive in a few important areas. Through my research, I have concluded that parents of the younger users of social networking websites should closely monitor their children’s use and conduct online. Important private information may be used against a user; they are prone to verbal or visual attacks by cyber bullies, and the use of the website may interfere with the user’s security in real life.
Bibliography
Jane Simpson."One in five children falls victim to the cyber bullies [Scot Region]. " Mail on Sunday [London (UK)] 15 Mar. 2009,15. ProQuest Newsstand. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 15 Mar. 2009
Omar L. Gallaga."With friends like these . . . " Austin American Statesman [Austin, Tex.] 14 Mar. 2009,F.1. ProQuest Newsstand. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 16 Mar. 2009
Wailin Wong. . "Social media another facet of teens' lives. " Chicago Tribune [Chicago, Ill.] 12 Feb. 2009,1.25. Chicago Tribune. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 10 Mar. 2009
FINAL EXAM
“Familial Archetypes: The Ideal and the Dysfunctional”
Families in America vary from your archetypical, well off “Brady bunch” family, to the single mother with three kids family that struggles to put food on the table, and everywhere in between. Mary Pipher believes that these millions of families throughout America could be placed into one of two descriptions: the idealized or the dysfunctional. The idealized families are outlets of love and happiness. When I think of this idea, I imagine the kids get a bowl of ice cream just before bedtime then run off to brush their teeth and hop in bed to have the father tuck them in and read a bed time story. Pipher suggests this ideal of a type of family was most prominent during the 1950’s, for this was shortly after the Great Depression and World War II. Following these devastating events, “there’s no place like home”(and family) was probably running through the minds of many. On the other hand, in the dysfunctional family; your family is basically the enemy. All family members do amongst each other is argue and bicker, never getting along or enjoying one another in any way. Pipher feels that the 1990’s was the era where this type of attitude towards family thrived. I can, for the most part agree with what Mary Pipher has to say on families. I agree that American families can essentially be placed in to one of these two categories. I believe that the structure of the family and the parents’ upbringing of their children is a key factor in which category the family will fall under. Ultimately, the parents are the people who start the family and they then have the power to form and structure it as they will.
To illustrate my view on this subject, I am going to compare the structure of my family with a good friend of mine’s. The friend will remain anonymous. My family would fall under the ideal family category. Growing up, I lived in one house my whole life and was raised with my younger brother and older sister by both my mom and dad, who were together at the time. I was always taught respect for my parents and siblings, and would be sure to get a spanking if I stepped out of line. Along with respect and discipline, I learned many other valuable lessons and morals from my parents. Basically, my home life was very structured; I did not in any way grow up on my own, always having my parents guiding hand leading the way. But don’t get me wrong; it was not perfect. There were countless times, especially in my adolescent days, where my parents or siblings and I clashed heads. Arguments even got pretty heated sometimes, yet something instilled in me from a young age always taught me to respect my parents. It was this healthy nourishment that my siblings and I received growing up that defines the kind of family we are today. Had my parents not kept a watchful eye on us as we grew up and taught us those good morals and values, and disciplining whenever necessary I am sure our family would not be the same outlet of love, happiness, and friendship that it is today. Lack of discipline, love, morals, values, or any combination of the above puts a family at risk of being “dysfunctional”.
I sympathize for my friend for they have had nowhere near the upbringing that they deserve. She was raised (if you could call it that) by her father up until early adolescence. Being a typical “hick”, her father fell rather short in teaching her love and respect and morals, however did quite the job at teaching her to have a foul mouth and burp and spit and so on. Amongst other horrible things he did, her dad drank constantly and gave his daughter no where near the attention she needed and deserved. After living with her father for her whole life up to adolescence, my good friend moved from Oregon to Washington to live with her mother where she spent years moving from apartment to apartment, even being homeless for a while. With constantly switching residences also came constant switching of schools and during all this time, her mother was there for her. The problem was, she was there as a friend, not so much as a mother. Today, my friend, her sister, mom, and step-father have finally settled into a permanent residence in a town-house apartment. Her mom and step-father both work jobs and she and her sister both go to school. The family is almost starting to sound ideal, yet it is far from it. If I were to go visit on any given day, some things I am very likely to see there might include obscenities flying around like a flock of wild geese aimed at each other, the tv, inanimate objects, or whatever. Its possible that the whole place might reek of marijuana from my friend and her step dad toking it up together. A few times my friend has even called me to come pick her up because she can’t stand her family and hates it in that place. The home life and familial relationships within my friend’s family are just as Pipher describes a “dysfunctional family”.
When I ponder “why?” her family the way it is, I come to the conclusion mentioned before. What my friend lacked was a structured and disciplined upbringing from either one of her parents. Nobody was there to teach respect for family members; no one taught the importance of loving one another and having close familial ties. There was a definite lack of discipline from childhood all the way through adolescence. And look at the effect: The family is chaotic. Members are constantly at each other’s throats, swearing is more common than turkey on thanksgiving; drugs are talked about, and even taken freely with no retribution. There is no real sense of a family bond. This is the dysfunctional family Mary Pipher describes.
Now if you think about it, any American family can really fall into either the category of ideal, or dysfunctional. It is without a doubt that either of these categories can be accomplished to different degrees. Maybe just one family member is a loose cannon and wants to sever their familial ties. Or maybe a family simply does not argue and bicker much, but the individual members are more busy living their own lives apart from one another to have an idealistic closeness in their relationship. Small variations like these to the two main categories Mary Pipher suggests describes all families are the only exceptions I see to her statement.
Variations of the idealistic family of the 1950’s and the dysfunctional family of the 1990’s still define American families to this day. I have concluded that the involvement of the parents in the forming of their families through raising their kids with love and discipline; instilling in them to have good morals and respect is absolutely vital in defining what category the family will fall under. I am not too ignorant to admit that there are surely other influences that factor in to how a family may act, yet I feel that the most power lies in the parents; the people who decided to start a family of their own in the first place.
Families in America vary from your archetypical, well off “Brady bunch” family, to the single mother with three kids family that struggles to put food on the table, and everywhere in between. Mary Pipher believes that these millions of families throughout America could be placed into one of two descriptions: the idealized or the dysfunctional. The idealized families are outlets of love and happiness. When I think of this idea, I imagine the kids get a bowl of ice cream just before bedtime then run off to brush their teeth and hop in bed to have the father tuck them in and read a bed time story. Pipher suggests this ideal of a type of family was most prominent during the 1950’s, for this was shortly after the Great Depression and World War II. Following these devastating events, “there’s no place like home”(and family) was probably running through the minds of many. On the other hand, in the dysfunctional family; your family is basically the enemy. All family members do amongst each other is argue and bicker, never getting along or enjoying one another in any way. Pipher feels that the 1990’s was the era where this type of attitude towards family thrived. I can, for the most part agree with what Mary Pipher has to say on families. I agree that American families can essentially be placed in to one of these two categories. I believe that the structure of the family and the parents’ upbringing of their children is a key factor in which category the family will fall under. Ultimately, the parents are the people who start the family and they then have the power to form and structure it as they will.
To illustrate my view on this subject, I am going to compare the structure of my family with a good friend of mine’s. The friend will remain anonymous. My family would fall under the ideal family category. Growing up, I lived in one house my whole life and was raised with my younger brother and older sister by both my mom and dad, who were together at the time. I was always taught respect for my parents and siblings, and would be sure to get a spanking if I stepped out of line. Along with respect and discipline, I learned many other valuable lessons and morals from my parents. Basically, my home life was very structured; I did not in any way grow up on my own, always having my parents guiding hand leading the way. But don’t get me wrong; it was not perfect. There were countless times, especially in my adolescent days, where my parents or siblings and I clashed heads. Arguments even got pretty heated sometimes, yet something instilled in me from a young age always taught me to respect my parents. It was this healthy nourishment that my siblings and I received growing up that defines the kind of family we are today. Had my parents not kept a watchful eye on us as we grew up and taught us those good morals and values, and disciplining whenever necessary I am sure our family would not be the same outlet of love, happiness, and friendship that it is today. Lack of discipline, love, morals, values, or any combination of the above puts a family at risk of being “dysfunctional”.
I sympathize for my friend for they have had nowhere near the upbringing that they deserve. She was raised (if you could call it that) by her father up until early adolescence. Being a typical “hick”, her father fell rather short in teaching her love and respect and morals, however did quite the job at teaching her to have a foul mouth and burp and spit and so on. Amongst other horrible things he did, her dad drank constantly and gave his daughter no where near the attention she needed and deserved. After living with her father for her whole life up to adolescence, my good friend moved from Oregon to Washington to live with her mother where she spent years moving from apartment to apartment, even being homeless for a while. With constantly switching residences also came constant switching of schools and during all this time, her mother was there for her. The problem was, she was there as a friend, not so much as a mother. Today, my friend, her sister, mom, and step-father have finally settled into a permanent residence in a town-house apartment. Her mom and step-father both work jobs and she and her sister both go to school. The family is almost starting to sound ideal, yet it is far from it. If I were to go visit on any given day, some things I am very likely to see there might include obscenities flying around like a flock of wild geese aimed at each other, the tv, inanimate objects, or whatever. Its possible that the whole place might reek of marijuana from my friend and her step dad toking it up together. A few times my friend has even called me to come pick her up because she can’t stand her family and hates it in that place. The home life and familial relationships within my friend’s family are just as Pipher describes a “dysfunctional family”.
When I ponder “why?” her family the way it is, I come to the conclusion mentioned before. What my friend lacked was a structured and disciplined upbringing from either one of her parents. Nobody was there to teach respect for family members; no one taught the importance of loving one another and having close familial ties. There was a definite lack of discipline from childhood all the way through adolescence. And look at the effect: The family is chaotic. Members are constantly at each other’s throats, swearing is more common than turkey on thanksgiving; drugs are talked about, and even taken freely with no retribution. There is no real sense of a family bond. This is the dysfunctional family Mary Pipher describes.
Now if you think about it, any American family can really fall into either the category of ideal, or dysfunctional. It is without a doubt that either of these categories can be accomplished to different degrees. Maybe just one family member is a loose cannon and wants to sever their familial ties. Or maybe a family simply does not argue and bicker much, but the individual members are more busy living their own lives apart from one another to have an idealistic closeness in their relationship. Small variations like these to the two main categories Mary Pipher suggests describes all families are the only exceptions I see to her statement.
Variations of the idealistic family of the 1950’s and the dysfunctional family of the 1990’s still define American families to this day. I have concluded that the involvement of the parents in the forming of their families through raising their kids with love and discipline; instilling in them to have good morals and respect is absolutely vital in defining what category the family will fall under. I am not too ignorant to admit that there are surely other influences that factor in to how a family may act, yet I feel that the most power lies in the parents; the people who decided to start a family of their own in the first place.
Reflective Letter (final)
Writing is a subject that I tend to find comparable to studying a rock in terms of joy and excitement. In other words it is not my subject of choice and I would much rather deal with numbers and equations or analyze the structure of our economy or something along those lines. However, over the course of writing 101 this quarter, I feel I have accomplished a lot as a writer. I have improved upon many of my essential skills as a writer and discovered what areas of writing I consider my strengths. Also, through completing the various assigned papers I have come to realize the areas of writing in which I am weaker and need to improve upon. The following portfolio contains two of the papers that I have written this quarter. These papers are basically exhibitions of my strengths and weaknesses as a writer I mentioned above. In addition, the editing and revisions I have made to these papers, some of which are contained in this letter, provide examples of how my writing skills have improved.
Seeing as how writing is not my favorite subject, there are some obvious areas within the necessary skills of writing that I feel I have plenty of room to improve in. One that I particularly notice is that I need to improve on my transitions from paragraph to paragraph. For example, in my essay "From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism", I end my first body paragraph which suggests that a hero is someone who will do anything for their fellow man with this sentence: “If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.” The following paragraph brings up my next point that a hero must be able to make quick, smart decisions on the spot, and begins with the sentence: “A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations.” My transition is not only weak, but practically non-existent. I have since added a transitional sentence in between these two, which reads: “The quality of sacrifice found within a hero might be matched only by their need for sound, on the spot judgment.” The addition of this sentence provides a link between the two paragraphs rather than abruptly switching from one point to the next. Another small, yet relevant attribute of writing I find myself stumbling over from time to time is when to use a comma, and when to use a semi-colon. This is an issue I have noticed common amongst my peers as well. More often than not, I find myself just going with a comma, probably because that is what is more familiar to me. For example, in my essay “Online Social Networking: Foundation for a New Set of Issues “, I had originally written a sentence as follows: “The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty, these acts would have never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site.” After rereading this sentence, I realized that use of a semi-colon in place of the comma was actually the correct way to write it. I made this change and found myself making many similar changes throughout my papers. Although there is endless room for improvement in my skills as a writer, I feel that I have already strongly developed some of these essential skills.
Throughout my years of writing, I have noticed that there are certain areas in which I consistently exhibit proficiency. Varying sentence structure and length is something I feel that I do very well in my papers. A paper that drones on and on with sentences that are all the same length and structure becomes very dull and boring and results in a paper that is torture on the brain of the reader. As a writer, it is one hundred percent essential to mix long, short, and in between length sentences within paragraphs. Along with this, varying the structure/type of sentence is also essential in creating a more readable paper. This involves using a combination of compound sentences, short powerful statements, rhetorical questions, vivid descriptions, etc. My strength in this area of writing is apparent throughout my second essay. The fifth paragraph, for example, contains sentences from a multiple of varieties. I use a sentence that describes bombs exploding and gunshots ringing through the air which is preceded by a very short and straight forward, six word sentence, yet followed by a longer, compound sentences. Shortly following I pose a question to the reader and use the next couple sentences to explain my answer to that question. It is that sort of sentence variation that creates an interesting paper to read, and one that does not become monotonous to the reader. Another key element vital to creating an attention grabbing paper is having voice. I feel my writing voice, particularly throughout this quarter in writing 101, has come a long way. I started out just writing the words that I felt would address the assigned topic for our classes’ papers, yet they seemed to lack my personality and did not really sound like me. However, I have recently put extra effort into adding in my voice in my papers and I feel the effort has paid off. This is especially apparent in my most recent paper. For this paper I chose a topic that is relevant to me and my peers. Writing about a familiar subject on which I have plenty of thoughts and opinions on such as social networking sites really allowed me to speak freely; expressing my ideas how they would sound if I were to be conversing with someone in real life. I would almost venture to say that I enjoyed reading articles related to the effects of social networking sites and responding to them with my own personal input; and that is saying something.
Despite the fact that writing is far from my subject of choice, I have put a lot of effort into improving myself as a writer this quarter. Not only have I tried to develop the areas in writing that needed it most, but I have put time into further increasing the areas in which I already had solid skills as well. Within this portfolio are the fruits of my labor: two assigned papers and my final exam. I only hope to entertain the reader and possibly teach them something new or cause them to view the subject matter from a different point of view.
Seeing as how writing is not my favorite subject, there are some obvious areas within the necessary skills of writing that I feel I have plenty of room to improve in. One that I particularly notice is that I need to improve on my transitions from paragraph to paragraph. For example, in my essay "From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism", I end my first body paragraph which suggests that a hero is someone who will do anything for their fellow man with this sentence: “If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.” The following paragraph brings up my next point that a hero must be able to make quick, smart decisions on the spot, and begins with the sentence: “A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations.” My transition is not only weak, but practically non-existent. I have since added a transitional sentence in between these two, which reads: “The quality of sacrifice found within a hero might be matched only by their need for sound, on the spot judgment.” The addition of this sentence provides a link between the two paragraphs rather than abruptly switching from one point to the next. Another small, yet relevant attribute of writing I find myself stumbling over from time to time is when to use a comma, and when to use a semi-colon. This is an issue I have noticed common amongst my peers as well. More often than not, I find myself just going with a comma, probably because that is what is more familiar to me. For example, in my essay “Online Social Networking: Foundation for a New Set of Issues “, I had originally written a sentence as follows: “The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty, these acts would have never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site.” After rereading this sentence, I realized that use of a semi-colon in place of the comma was actually the correct way to write it. I made this change and found myself making many similar changes throughout my papers. Although there is endless room for improvement in my skills as a writer, I feel that I have already strongly developed some of these essential skills.
Throughout my years of writing, I have noticed that there are certain areas in which I consistently exhibit proficiency. Varying sentence structure and length is something I feel that I do very well in my papers. A paper that drones on and on with sentences that are all the same length and structure becomes very dull and boring and results in a paper that is torture on the brain of the reader. As a writer, it is one hundred percent essential to mix long, short, and in between length sentences within paragraphs. Along with this, varying the structure/type of sentence is also essential in creating a more readable paper. This involves using a combination of compound sentences, short powerful statements, rhetorical questions, vivid descriptions, etc. My strength in this area of writing is apparent throughout my second essay. The fifth paragraph, for example, contains sentences from a multiple of varieties. I use a sentence that describes bombs exploding and gunshots ringing through the air which is preceded by a very short and straight forward, six word sentence, yet followed by a longer, compound sentences. Shortly following I pose a question to the reader and use the next couple sentences to explain my answer to that question. It is that sort of sentence variation that creates an interesting paper to read, and one that does not become monotonous to the reader. Another key element vital to creating an attention grabbing paper is having voice. I feel my writing voice, particularly throughout this quarter in writing 101, has come a long way. I started out just writing the words that I felt would address the assigned topic for our classes’ papers, yet they seemed to lack my personality and did not really sound like me. However, I have recently put extra effort into adding in my voice in my papers and I feel the effort has paid off. This is especially apparent in my most recent paper. For this paper I chose a topic that is relevant to me and my peers. Writing about a familiar subject on which I have plenty of thoughts and opinions on such as social networking sites really allowed me to speak freely; expressing my ideas how they would sound if I were to be conversing with someone in real life. I would almost venture to say that I enjoyed reading articles related to the effects of social networking sites and responding to them with my own personal input; and that is saying something.
Despite the fact that writing is far from my subject of choice, I have put a lot of effort into improving myself as a writer this quarter. Not only have I tried to develop the areas in writing that needed it most, but I have put time into further increasing the areas in which I already had solid skills as well. Within this portfolio are the fruits of my labor: two assigned papers and my final exam. I only hope to entertain the reader and possibly teach them something new or cause them to view the subject matter from a different point of view.
Essay 2 (revised) for Portfolio
"From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism"
There he stood. Sweat dripping down his forehead as his eyes aimed through the sights of his rifle, squinting to enable him to see through the blaring desert sun. The enemy came within range, and the hero did what he had to: He put a bullet right in the chest of that twelve year old boy.
At first glance, that story might seem repulsive and to entitle that man as a ‘hero’ would sound far from right. Mikah King is both a hero and great friend of mine, and that is one of the many stories he has shared with me. The word ‘hero’ to me defines someone who puts others above themselves, and can react quickly, making a smart decision when thrown into tough situations. In light of this, the people who first come to mind when I think of heroes are the men and women of the United States armed services. Mikah has been in the navy for over two and a half years now, and has displayed brilliant acts of courage and strength. He always puts his comrades above himself, and is quick and bright enough to survive in the modern warfare of our age. For these reasons I am proud to call Mikah my friend, and hero.
To fully appreciate Mikah’s heroism, I believe it’s necessary to first learn about his past. Before he first left for boot camp a couple years ago, Mikah was a completely different person than he is now. He was into some unhealthy habits related to drug use and not enrolled in school of any sort. I won’t be any more specific about the drug abuse out of respect for my friend, but basically he was setting himself up to fail and did not seem to either realize, or care. Then, quite out of the blue really, I come to find out that Mikah had joined the Navy, and already had a date for departure to San Diego, California where he would begin training. Talk about taking a huge step in the right direction. He had chosen to get off the path of darkness which led to certain failure. Gun-shots, grenades, explosions, and all those other wonderful perkswez that come with the military life wouldn’t exactly be a walk in the park, but Mikah knew that when he signed up. He is a tough guy, and finding out what he would be doing with his life made me proud to be his friend. This was when Mikah first started to form into the mold of a ‘hero’ in my eyes.
As a member of the US Navy, Mikah is a soldier who would do anything for his fellow man. He recently came back for a 10 day break and had countless stories to tell of intense combat situations where many lives were at stake. He told me of a time where him and his team were stationed in Fallujah, Iraq, where one must always be alert and ready for action. He was wearing his bullet-proof flak jacket when suddenly a gun shot rang out and whizzed right past one of his fellow soldiers. Putting his friend’s life above his own, Mikah grabbed him by the collar of his jacket and desperately yanked him downward, throwing him to the ground just in time to save him from the next bullet. However, in return Mikah took that bullet himself, directly to the right side of the chest. The blow, which he described felt like unsuspectingly taking a full force knockout punch from Mike Tyson, instantly knocked the wind out of Mikah and put him on his ass for a few seconds. Lucky for Mikah he was wearing that flak jacket, for its without a doubt a better alternative to be winded for a few seconds, than dead forever. This brave act to me makes my classification of Mikah as a hero irrefutable. If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.
A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations. The story in the beginning of this essay greatly exemplifies Mikah’s ability to do this. Although one’s initial thoughts after hearing he shot and killed a boy who was merely twelve years old might be somewhere along the lines of, ‘wow, this guy is a sick bastard’, I assure you, he is not. Out in the desert things are different. Bombs explode and shots ring out from weapons of all sorts on a daily basis. The war concept of kill or be killed doesn’t discriminate against age, and when a little boy who isn’t even old enough to be in high school but can shoot an AK-47 is coming at you, it is sad what has to be done. However it takes a true hero to be able to make the right choice, which in this case was to shoot down the Iraqi insurgent despite his age. What could have happened had Mikah hesitated? He or his fellow comrade’s could have been injured, or even killed. For crucial circumstances bring with them crucial consequences, therefore a hero must be able to react quickly and with sound judgment in these situations and make a choice that will result in the most optimum outcome. That person is Mikah.
Before leaving for the Navy, Mikah was a good friend of mine, but far from a hero. Now that he has those experiences and all that he went though, and has shared with me those stories of courage and sacrifice; I now view him with new eyes; He is a changed man. And in no way was any of the change negative. He has gone from essentially a nobody with no potential, to a soldier; From someone looked down upon by most to a man who now has the respect of nearly everyone in this country; From my good friend Mikah, to my great friend, as well as hero, Mikah King: proud member of the US Navy.
ESSAY 4 FINAL DRAFT
Online Social Networking: Foundation for a New Set of Issues
Teens, adults, and everyone in between flock to social networking sites like new age flies to electronic feces. Sites such as Myspace and Facebook have grown exponentially since they have been created; gaining thousands of new users every day. Following cell phones and email, these websites were quickly becoming the next step to the future of social networking. This new technology has allowed people to make many new “friends” in a short amount of time, while also keeping in contact with old ones. However, social networking websites are slowly diminishing many vital aspects of today’s society, and its social skills. Most importantly, seemingly friendly websites like Twitter, and Friendster have built the foundation for the new age “cyber bully”, as well as creating many problems pertaining to privacy and personal security.
Let’s investigate the world of online social networking from the bottom up, following the unveiling of these websites through the eyes of a high school parent. The parent explores the idea with a panel of five and finds they are a means of personal expression and getting attention for students and parents alike. A student that was a part of this discussion adds that he prefers online social networking to face to face interaction because “it’s not as demanding,” and he has time to think in between responses. Researchers at the MacArthur foundation claim that children are protected and their personal information “is considered as off-limits to adults as a locked diary.” Though this article tells the audience about many positive aspects of online communication and social networking, they don’t leave out the fact that “parents have legitimate concerns when it comes to the dark side of online interaction, including bullying and cyber security issues. Many also worry their children don't fully grasp how the content they post online can be viewed by future employers.”
These websites are clearly a hit with the younger audience, as getting attention and personal expression are desired by growing teenagers. But the claim that children’s personal web pages are inaccessible by adults, predators, and bullies alike is a false sense of security. I know from personal experience that all members of Myspace have full control over their privacy settings. If a child chooses to, their personal information may be available to anyone who decides to browse it. Not only this, but messages may be sent to users even if their privacy settings are set to block out strangers. With positives come negatives, and its clear that within the millions of members on these websites, some users will use them as tools for mischief. It is now apparent that social networking sites are very popular with today’s generation, but could there be some dangers involved?
“One in five children falls victim to the cyber bullies” is a newspaper article that elaborates on the fact that online social networking is not always fun and games. A study was done by T-Mobile that “asked 3,000 11-16 year olds across the country if they had received bullying text messages and emails.” The results were unfortunate, showing that “Of those questioned, 46 per cent said the messages made them feel threatened and a further 44 per cent were embarrassed to have been victimised.” Verbal attacks from “hi-tech predators” didn’t just end at name calling. The article states that bullies have been known to go as far as posting degrading videos on public sites like YouTube, according to the YouGov poll. One might assume that this type of crude and demeaning behavior is aimed only towards younger victims. However, a different study also concluded that “one-fifth of all teachers north of the Border claimed they had suffered abuse from pupils via websites or mobile phones,” and “Some staff also reported that their faces had been superimposed onto pornographic images which were then posted on the internet.” These statistics go to show the new, horrible forms of social terrorism bullys are capable of due to the increasing popularity and constant use of social networking sites by people today. On the bright side, the findings in these studies have birthed a new internet and texting service called “TxtUp StandUp” which will allow for students or victims of online bullies to give and get advice through text messages or online.
The previous article reaffirmed some of my thoughts about online social networking while teaching me about other downfalls of them. We all hear about sexual predators that prey on young children through online chat rooms, however, it seems little attention has been paid to smaller scale issues such as online bullies which can also make a substantial negative impact on a person’s morale, reputation, and self image. The fact that twenty percent of children fall victim to this unethical behavior says a lot about the often unmentioned, darker aspects of online networking. If a student is bullied at school, he/she knows who is verbally attacking them, and can take the proper steps to stop the attacker from repeating that behavior. However, the security and anonymity available to anyone online can empower the bully, while weakening his targets ability to protect themselves from the verbal or visual attacks. Being bullied at school with the security of teachers around and the ability to get help from an authority almost right away seems like heaven compared to the possibility of seeing a demeaning video of oneself posted on Youtube by an anonymous account. I think that technology and social networking sites have simply given bullies another medium of picking on their peers.
The article, “With friends like these . . .,” deals with common online situations and how they should be handled appropriately on the web, and sometimes in real life. The first situation poses the hypothetical situation of one’s boss wanting to add them on Facebook. Two experts, “Anna Post, the great-great-granddaughter of manners guru Emily Post, is an author and associate with the Emily Post Institute, she specializes in 21st-century etiquette,” and Connie Reece, “one of 25 recent American-Statesman Texas Social Media Award Winners, is the founder of Every Dot Connects, an Austin social media company,” give their advice on how to act in these often tricky situations. “Connie Reece: If you're uncomfortable with it, don't add him. If he brings it to your attention, reply that you use that network solely for personal, not professional, relationships. Remember that if your Twitter account is public, your boss can follow and read your "tweets" without your reciprocating. Think twice before venting about work; once you hit "send," you can't take your words back. On Facebook, you can sort friends into groups that you create, and you can set privacy controls accordingly.” Another situation mentioned in the article talks about friends posting unflattering photos of one in a group. The expertise given from Anna and Connie advises that you politely ask your friend to take the photo down if it makes you uncomfortable or is considered cyber-bullying. Connie also adds, “if you were having a bad hair day or your smile was encased in three yards of metal, then suck it up. We all looked like dorks in high school.”
“Suck it up” sounds like some harsh advice coming from an owner of an Austin social media company. The problem here is, a victim of cyber-bullying has essentially no control over what crude comments, pictures, or videos are posted on the web concerning them. Sure, a good friend will have no problem deleting a bad picture of you from their Facebook photo album, but a bully will be filled with glee as their victim hopelessly begs them to delete a demeaning or private picture posted to Myspace or Facebook from a quickly composed, new, and anonymous account. Reconsider the first situation stated in the previous article. Hypothetically speaking, a college student’s boss added him/her on Facebook, only to find incriminating photos of that individual at a party, surrounded by other students drinking. The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty; these acts would have otherwise never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site. Keeping in touch with old friends is great, but once text or visual media posted online interferes with someone’s real personal or professional life, a line is being crossed.
Online social networking sites do offer a chance for people to make new connections, and maintain current ones, but the negative aspects outweigh the positive in a few important areas. Through my research, I have concluded that parents of the younger users of social networking websites should closely monitor their children’s use and conduct online. Important private information may be used against a user; they are prone to verbal or visual attacks by cyber bullies, and the use of the website may interfere with the user’s security in real life.
Bibliography
Jane Simpson."One in five children falls victim to the cyber bullies [Scot Region]. " Mail on Sunday [London (UK)] 15 Mar. 2009,15. ProQuest Newsstand. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 15 Mar. 2009
Omar L. Gallaga."With friends like these . . . " Austin American Statesman [Austin, Tex.] 14 Mar. 2009,F.1. ProQuest Newsstand. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 16 Mar. 2009
Wailin Wong. . "Social media another facet of teens' lives. " Chicago Tribune [Chicago, Ill.] 12 Feb. 2009,1.25. Chicago Tribune. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 10 Mar. 2009
Teens, adults, and everyone in between flock to social networking sites like new age flies to electronic feces. Sites such as Myspace and Facebook have grown exponentially since they have been created; gaining thousands of new users every day. Following cell phones and email, these websites were quickly becoming the next step to the future of social networking. This new technology has allowed people to make many new “friends” in a short amount of time, while also keeping in contact with old ones. However, social networking websites are slowly diminishing many vital aspects of today’s society, and its social skills. Most importantly, seemingly friendly websites like Twitter, and Friendster have built the foundation for the new age “cyber bully”, as well as creating many problems pertaining to privacy and personal security.
Let’s investigate the world of online social networking from the bottom up, following the unveiling of these websites through the eyes of a high school parent. The parent explores the idea with a panel of five and finds they are a means of personal expression and getting attention for students and parents alike. A student that was a part of this discussion adds that he prefers online social networking to face to face interaction because “it’s not as demanding,” and he has time to think in between responses. Researchers at the MacArthur foundation claim that children are protected and their personal information “is considered as off-limits to adults as a locked diary.” Though this article tells the audience about many positive aspects of online communication and social networking, they don’t leave out the fact that “parents have legitimate concerns when it comes to the dark side of online interaction, including bullying and cyber security issues. Many also worry their children don't fully grasp how the content they post online can be viewed by future employers.”
These websites are clearly a hit with the younger audience, as getting attention and personal expression are desired by growing teenagers. But the claim that children’s personal web pages are inaccessible by adults, predators, and bullies alike is a false sense of security. I know from personal experience that all members of Myspace have full control over their privacy settings. If a child chooses to, their personal information may be available to anyone who decides to browse it. Not only this, but messages may be sent to users even if their privacy settings are set to block out strangers. With positives come negatives, and its clear that within the millions of members on these websites, some users will use them as tools for mischief. It is now apparent that social networking sites are very popular with today’s generation, but could there be some dangers involved?
“One in five children falls victim to the cyber bullies” is a newspaper article that elaborates on the fact that online social networking is not always fun and games. A study was done by T-Mobile that “asked 3,000 11-16 year olds across the country if they had received bullying text messages and emails.” The results were unfortunate, showing that “Of those questioned, 46 per cent said the messages made them feel threatened and a further 44 per cent were embarrassed to have been victimised.” Verbal attacks from “hi-tech predators” didn’t just end at name calling. The article states that bullies have been known to go as far as posting degrading videos on public sites like YouTube, according to the YouGov poll. One might assume that this type of crude and demeaning behavior is aimed only towards younger victims. However, a different study also concluded that “one-fifth of all teachers north of the Border claimed they had suffered abuse from pupils via websites or mobile phones,” and “Some staff also reported that their faces had been superimposed onto pornographic images which were then posted on the internet.” These statistics go to show the new, horrible forms of social terrorism bullys are capable of due to the increasing popularity and constant use of social networking sites by people today. On the bright side, the findings in these studies have birthed a new internet and texting service called “TxtUp StandUp” which will allow for students or victims of online bullies to give and get advice through text messages or online.
The previous article reaffirmed some of my thoughts about online social networking while teaching me about other downfalls of them. We all hear about sexual predators that prey on young children through online chat rooms, however, it seems little attention has been paid to smaller scale issues such as online bullies which can also make a substantial negative impact on a person’s morale, reputation, and self image. The fact that twenty percent of children fall victim to this unethical behavior says a lot about the often unmentioned, darker aspects of online networking. If a student is bullied at school, he/she knows who is verbally attacking them, and can take the proper steps to stop the attacker from repeating that behavior. However, the security and anonymity available to anyone online can empower the bully, while weakening his targets ability to protect themselves from the verbal or visual attacks. Being bullied at school with the security of teachers around and the ability to get help from an authority almost right away seems like heaven compared to the possibility of seeing a demeaning video of oneself posted on Youtube by an anonymous account. I think that technology and social networking sites have simply given bullies another medium of picking on their peers.
The article, “With friends like these . . .,” deals with common online situations and how they should be handled appropriately on the web, and sometimes in real life. The first situation poses the hypothetical situation of one’s boss wanting to add them on Facebook. Two experts, “Anna Post, the great-great-granddaughter of manners guru Emily Post, is an author and associate with the Emily Post Institute, she specializes in 21st-century etiquette,” and Connie Reece, “one of 25 recent American-Statesman Texas Social Media Award Winners, is the founder of Every Dot Connects, an Austin social media company,” give their advice on how to act in these often tricky situations. “Connie Reece: If you're uncomfortable with it, don't add him. If he brings it to your attention, reply that you use that network solely for personal, not professional, relationships. Remember that if your Twitter account is public, your boss can follow and read your "tweets" without your reciprocating. Think twice before venting about work; once you hit "send," you can't take your words back. On Facebook, you can sort friends into groups that you create, and you can set privacy controls accordingly.” Another situation mentioned in the article talks about friends posting unflattering photos of one in a group. The expertise given from Anna and Connie advises that you politely ask your friend to take the photo down if it makes you uncomfortable or is considered cyber-bullying. Connie also adds, “if you were having a bad hair day or your smile was encased in three yards of metal, then suck it up. We all looked like dorks in high school.”
“Suck it up” sounds like some harsh advice coming from an owner of an Austin social media company. The problem here is, a victim of cyber-bullying has essentially no control over what crude comments, pictures, or videos are posted on the web concerning them. Sure, a good friend will have no problem deleting a bad picture of you from their Facebook photo album, but a bully will be filled with glee as their victim hopelessly begs them to delete a demeaning or private picture posted to Myspace or Facebook from a quickly composed, new, and anonymous account. Reconsider the first situation stated in the previous article. Hypothetically speaking, a college student’s boss added him/her on Facebook, only to find incriminating photos of that individual at a party, surrounded by other students drinking. The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty; these acts would have otherwise never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site. Keeping in touch with old friends is great, but once text or visual media posted online interferes with someone’s real personal or professional life, a line is being crossed.
Online social networking sites do offer a chance for people to make new connections, and maintain current ones, but the negative aspects outweigh the positive in a few important areas. Through my research, I have concluded that parents of the younger users of social networking websites should closely monitor their children’s use and conduct online. Important private information may be used against a user; they are prone to verbal or visual attacks by cyber bullies, and the use of the website may interfere with the user’s security in real life.
Bibliography
Jane Simpson."One in five children falls victim to the cyber bullies [Scot Region]. " Mail on Sunday [London (UK)] 15 Mar. 2009,15. ProQuest Newsstand. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 15 Mar. 2009
Omar L. Gallaga."With friends like these . . . " Austin American Statesman [Austin, Tex.] 14 Mar. 2009,F.1. ProQuest Newsstand. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 16 Mar. 2009
Wailin Wong. . "Social media another facet of teens' lives. " Chicago Tribune [Chicago, Ill.] 12 Feb. 2009,1.25. Chicago Tribune. ProQuest. KCLS, Federal Way, WA. 10 Mar. 2009
reflective letter
Writing is a subject that I tend to find comparable to studying a rock in terms of joy and excitement. In other words it is not my subject of choice and I would much rather deal with numbers and equations or analyze the structure of our economy or something along those lines. However, over the course of writing 101 this quarter, I feel I have accomplished a lot as a writer. I have improved upon many of my essential skills as a writer and discovered what areas of writing I consider my strengths. Also, through completing the various assigned papers I have come to realize the areas of writing in which I am weaker and need to improve upon. The following portfolio contains two of the papers that I have written this quarter. These papers are basically exhibitions of my strengths and weaknesses as a writer I mentioned above. In addition, the editing and revisions I have made to these papers, some of which are contained in this letter, provide examples of how my writing skills have improved.
Seeing as how writing is not my favorite subject, there are some obvious areas within the necessary skills of writing that I feel I have plenty of room to improve in. One that I particularly notice is that I need to improve on my transitions from paragraph to paragraph. For example, in my essay "From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism", I end my first body paragraph which suggests that a hero is someone who will do anything for their fellow man with this sentence: “If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.” The following paragraph brings up my next point that a hero must be able to make quick, smart decisions on the spot, and begins with the sentence: “A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations.” My transition is not only weak, but practically non-existent. I have since added a transitional sentence in between these two, which reads: “The quality of sacrifice found within a hero might be matched only by their need for sound, on the spot judgment.” The addition of this sentence provides a link between the two paragraphs rather than abruptly switching from one point to the next. Another small, yet relevant attribute of writing I find myself stumbling over from time to time is when to use a comma, and when to use a semi-colon. This is an issue I have noticed common amongst my peers as well. More often than not, I find myself just going with a comma, probably because that is what is more familiar to me. For example, in my essay “Social Networking Sites, Breeding Grounds for Social Issues“, I had originally written a sentence as follows: “The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty, these acts would have never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site.” After rereading this sentence, I realized that use of a semi-colon in place of the comma was actually the correct way to write it. I made this change and found myself making many similar changes throughout my papers. Although there is endless room for improvement in my skills as a writer, I feel that I have already strongly developed some of these essential skills.
Throughout my years of writing, I have noticed that there are certain areas in which I consistently exhibit proficiency. Varying sentence structure and length is something I feel that I do very well in my papers. A paper that drones on and on with sentences that are all the same length and structure becomes very dull and boring and results in a paper that is torture on the brain of the reader. As a writer, it is one hundred percent essential to mix long, short, and in between length sentences within paragraphs. Along with this, varying the structure/type of sentence is also essential in creating a more readable paper. This involves using a combination of compound sentences, short powerful statements, rhetorical questions, vivid descriptions, etc. My strength in this area of writing is apparent throughout my second essay. The fifth paragraph, for example, contains sentences from a multiple of varieties. I use a sentence that describes bombs exploding and gunshots ringing through the air which is preceded by a very short and straight forward, six word sentence, yet followed by a longer, compound sentences. Shortly following I pose a question to the reader and use the next couple sentences to explain my answer to that question. It is that sort of sentence variation that creates an interesting paper to read, and one that does not become monotonous to the reader. Another key element vital to creating an attention grabbing paper is having voice. I feel my writing voice, particularly throughout this quarter in writing 101, has come a long way. I started out just writing the words that I felt would address the assigned topic for our classes’ papers, yet they seemed to lack my personality and did not really sound like me. However, I have recently put extra effort into adding in my voice in my papers and I feel the effort has paid off. This is especially apparent in my most recent paper. For this paper I chose a topic that is relevant to me and my peers. Writing about a familiar subject on which I have plenty of thoughts and opinions to write about such as social networking sites really allowed me to speak freely, expressing my ideas how they would sound if I were to be conversing with someone in real life. I would almost venture to say that I enjoyed reading articles related to the social effects of social networking sites and responding to them with my own personal input; and that is saying something.
Despite the fact that writing is far from my subject of choice, I have put a lot of effort into improving myself as a writer this quarter. Not only have I tried to develop the areas in writing that needed it most, but I have put time into further increasing the areas in which I already had solid skills as well. Within this portfolio are the fruits of my labor: two assigned papers and my final exam. I only hope to entertain the reader and possibly teach them something new or cause them to view the subject matter from a different point of view.
Seeing as how writing is not my favorite subject, there are some obvious areas within the necessary skills of writing that I feel I have plenty of room to improve in. One that I particularly notice is that I need to improve on my transitions from paragraph to paragraph. For example, in my essay "From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism", I end my first body paragraph which suggests that a hero is someone who will do anything for their fellow man with this sentence: “If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.” The following paragraph brings up my next point that a hero must be able to make quick, smart decisions on the spot, and begins with the sentence: “A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations.” My transition is not only weak, but practically non-existent. I have since added a transitional sentence in between these two, which reads: “The quality of sacrifice found within a hero might be matched only by their need for sound, on the spot judgment.” The addition of this sentence provides a link between the two paragraphs rather than abruptly switching from one point to the next. Another small, yet relevant attribute of writing I find myself stumbling over from time to time is when to use a comma, and when to use a semi-colon. This is an issue I have noticed common amongst my peers as well. More often than not, I find myself just going with a comma, probably because that is what is more familiar to me. For example, in my essay “Social Networking Sites, Breeding Grounds for Social Issues“, I had originally written a sentence as follows: “The boss might fire his employee for the acts he engaged in while off duty, these acts would have never been considered had the boss and employee not been friends on an online social networking site.” After rereading this sentence, I realized that use of a semi-colon in place of the comma was actually the correct way to write it. I made this change and found myself making many similar changes throughout my papers. Although there is endless room for improvement in my skills as a writer, I feel that I have already strongly developed some of these essential skills.
Throughout my years of writing, I have noticed that there are certain areas in which I consistently exhibit proficiency. Varying sentence structure and length is something I feel that I do very well in my papers. A paper that drones on and on with sentences that are all the same length and structure becomes very dull and boring and results in a paper that is torture on the brain of the reader. As a writer, it is one hundred percent essential to mix long, short, and in between length sentences within paragraphs. Along with this, varying the structure/type of sentence is also essential in creating a more readable paper. This involves using a combination of compound sentences, short powerful statements, rhetorical questions, vivid descriptions, etc. My strength in this area of writing is apparent throughout my second essay. The fifth paragraph, for example, contains sentences from a multiple of varieties. I use a sentence that describes bombs exploding and gunshots ringing through the air which is preceded by a very short and straight forward, six word sentence, yet followed by a longer, compound sentences. Shortly following I pose a question to the reader and use the next couple sentences to explain my answer to that question. It is that sort of sentence variation that creates an interesting paper to read, and one that does not become monotonous to the reader. Another key element vital to creating an attention grabbing paper is having voice. I feel my writing voice, particularly throughout this quarter in writing 101, has come a long way. I started out just writing the words that I felt would address the assigned topic for our classes’ papers, yet they seemed to lack my personality and did not really sound like me. However, I have recently put extra effort into adding in my voice in my papers and I feel the effort has paid off. This is especially apparent in my most recent paper. For this paper I chose a topic that is relevant to me and my peers. Writing about a familiar subject on which I have plenty of thoughts and opinions to write about such as social networking sites really allowed me to speak freely, expressing my ideas how they would sound if I were to be conversing with someone in real life. I would almost venture to say that I enjoyed reading articles related to the social effects of social networking sites and responding to them with my own personal input; and that is saying something.
Despite the fact that writing is far from my subject of choice, I have put a lot of effort into improving myself as a writer this quarter. Not only have I tried to develop the areas in writing that needed it most, but I have put time into further increasing the areas in which I already had solid skills as well. Within this portfolio are the fruits of my labor: two assigned papers and my final exam. I only hope to entertain the reader and possibly teach them something new or cause them to view the subject matter from a different point of view.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
essay 4 rough rough rough draft not finished (ntevenclose)
Teens, adults, and everyone in between flock to social networking sites like new age flies to electronic feces. Sites such as Myspace and Facebook have grown exponentially since they have been created; gaining thousands of new users every day. These websites were inevitably the next step to social networking. Though this new technology has allowed people to make many new “friends” in a short amount of time, I believe that social networking sites are diminishing our societies face to face interaction time, and consequently, overall social skills. Though Myspace and Facebook allow for easy viewing of pictures and sending messages, I believe they replace the need for younger people to gain essential face to face conversation skills, network with people in real life, and learn the confidence required to make “actual” new friends.
If all one knows is “chattin with the babes online,” how will they proceed to make meaningful conversation when the time comes where they must interact in the real life? From personal experience, I know that people will say things online or through text messages that they would normally not dare say to someone in person. The social networking website is like a façade behind which the user feels confident and invincible to the social boundaries that bind them in real life. For example, if a girl gives me a compliment while we are messaging on Facebook, my natural response is something like “thanks sweetie.” However, I have noticed I am far too shy to call an unfamiliar girl such a name in person. So when a teenager spends too much time chatting online, they may confuse what is appropriate in face to face conversation due to lack of experience. Another thing that people who spend a lot of time on social networking sites may lack is the ability to read body language (a skill I have found particularly handy on many occasions). For instance, I have been observant enough to realize that when someone at a party is standing with their arms crossed, they might feel some kind of discomfort. Again, someone without this experience might confuse the person’s unvoiced signals, only to say the wrong thing, or be rejected.
Websites like Myspace and Facebook make networking so easy. The problem here is that networking online really is too easy. It is much easier to do something like make a new business connection while chatting online because one has the liberty of thinking about what they want to say next as the other person types. This is not a reality in face to face interactions; quick wits and being personable are what can make or break a potentially important conversation. This can be crucial in so many vital social situations such as job interviews, meeting new people, talking to girls, etc.
If all one knows is “chattin with the babes online,” how will they proceed to make meaningful conversation when the time comes where they must interact in the real life? From personal experience, I know that people will say things online or through text messages that they would normally not dare say to someone in person. The social networking website is like a façade behind which the user feels confident and invincible to the social boundaries that bind them in real life. For example, if a girl gives me a compliment while we are messaging on Facebook, my natural response is something like “thanks sweetie.” However, I have noticed I am far too shy to call an unfamiliar girl such a name in person. So when a teenager spends too much time chatting online, they may confuse what is appropriate in face to face conversation due to lack of experience. Another thing that people who spend a lot of time on social networking sites may lack is the ability to read body language (a skill I have found particularly handy on many occasions). For instance, I have been observant enough to realize that when someone at a party is standing with their arms crossed, they might feel some kind of discomfort. Again, someone without this experience might confuse the person’s unvoiced signals, only to say the wrong thing, or be rejected.
Websites like Myspace and Facebook make networking so easy. The problem here is that networking online really is too easy. It is much easier to do something like make a new business connection while chatting online because one has the liberty of thinking about what they want to say next as the other person types. This is not a reality in face to face interactions; quick wits and being personable are what can make or break a potentially important conversation. This can be crucial in so many vital social situations such as job interviews, meeting new people, talking to girls, etc.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Reflective Letter rough draft (~70% comp)
Writing is a subject that I tend to find comparable to studying a rock in terms of joy and excitement. In other words it is not my subject of choice and I would much rather deal with numbers and equations or analyze the structure of our economy or something along those lines. However, over the course of writing 101 this quarter, I feel I have accomplished a lot as a writer. I have improved upon many of my essential skills as a writer and discovered what areas of writing I consider my strengths. Also, through completing the various assigned papers I have come to realize the areas of writing in which I am weaker and need to improve upon. The following portfolio contains two of the papers that I have written this quarter. These papers are basically exhibitions of my strengths and weaknesses as a writer I mentioned above. In addition, the editing and revisions I have made to these papers, some of which are contained in this letter, provide examples of how my writing skills have improved.
Seeing as how writing is not my favorite subject, there are some obvious areas within the necessary skills of writing that I consider to be my weaknesses. One that I particularly notice is that I need to improve on my transitions from paragraph to paragraph. For example, in my essay "From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism", I end my first body paragraph which suggests that a hero is someone who will do anything for their fellow man with this sentence: “If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.” The following paragraph brings up my next point that a hero must be able to make quick, smart decisions on the spot, and begins with the sentence: “A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations.” My transition is not only weak, but practically non-existent. I have since added a transitional sentence in between these two, which reads: “The quality of sacrifice found within a hero might be matched only by their need for sound, on the spot judgment.” The addition of this sentence provides a link between the two paragraphs rather than abruptly switching from one point to the next.---------------------------------------------------------------- ‘insert another weaknes here’-------------------------------------------------------------
Throughout my years of writing, I have noticed that there are certain areas in which I consistently exhibit proficiency. Varying sentence structure and length is something I feel that I do very well in my papers. A paper that drones on and on with sentences that are all the same length and structure becomes very dull and boring and results in a paper that is torture on the brain of the reader. As a writer, it is one hundred percent necessary to mix long, short, and in between length sentences within paragraphs. Along with this, varying the structure/type of sentence is also essential in creating a more readable paper. This involves using a combination of compound sentences, short powerful statements, rhetorical questions, vivid descriptions, etc. My strength in this area of writing is apparent throughout my second essay. The fifth paragraph, for example, contains sentences from a multiple of varieties. I use a sentence that describes bombs exploding and gunshots ringing through the air which is preceded by a very short and straight forward, six word sentence, yet followed by a longer, compound sentences. Shortly following I pose a question to the reader and use the next couple sentences to explain my answer to that question. It is that sort of sentence variation that creates an interesting paper to read, and one that does not become monotonous to the reader.
Seeing as how writing is not my favorite subject, there are some obvious areas within the necessary skills of writing that I consider to be my weaknesses. One that I particularly notice is that I need to improve on my transitions from paragraph to paragraph. For example, in my essay "From Darkness to Light, A Story of Heroism", I end my first body paragraph which suggests that a hero is someone who will do anything for their fellow man with this sentence: “If saving a fellow comrade from certain death by bullet and absorbing the blow yourself does not make someone a hero, then I don’t know what does.” The following paragraph brings up my next point that a hero must be able to make quick, smart decisions on the spot, and begins with the sentence: “A hero must also be able to make quick and smart decisions when they are thrown into extraordinary situations.” My transition is not only weak, but practically non-existent. I have since added a transitional sentence in between these two, which reads: “The quality of sacrifice found within a hero might be matched only by their need for sound, on the spot judgment.” The addition of this sentence provides a link between the two paragraphs rather than abruptly switching from one point to the next.---------------------------------------------------------------- ‘insert another weaknes here’-------------------------------------------------------------
Throughout my years of writing, I have noticed that there are certain areas in which I consistently exhibit proficiency. Varying sentence structure and length is something I feel that I do very well in my papers. A paper that drones on and on with sentences that are all the same length and structure becomes very dull and boring and results in a paper that is torture on the brain of the reader. As a writer, it is one hundred percent necessary to mix long, short, and in between length sentences within paragraphs. Along with this, varying the structure/type of sentence is also essential in creating a more readable paper. This involves using a combination of compound sentences, short powerful statements, rhetorical questions, vivid descriptions, etc. My strength in this area of writing is apparent throughout my second essay. The fifth paragraph, for example, contains sentences from a multiple of varieties. I use a sentence that describes bombs exploding and gunshots ringing through the air which is preceded by a very short and straight forward, six word sentence, yet followed by a longer, compound sentences. Shortly following I pose a question to the reader and use the next couple sentences to explain my answer to that question. It is that sort of sentence variation that creates an interesting paper to read, and one that does not become monotonous to the reader.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Reflective Letter intro P
Writing is a subject that I tend to find comparable to studying a rock in terms of joy and excitement. In other words it is not my subject of choice and I would be much more excited to deal with numbers and equations or analyze the structure of our economy. However, over the course of writing 101 this quarter, I feel I have accomplished a lot as a writer. I have improved upon many of my essential skills as a writer and discovered what areas of writing I consider my strengths. Also, through completing the various assigned papers I have come to realize the areas of writing in which I am weaker and need to improve upon. The following portfolio contains two of the papers that I have written this quarter. These papers are basically exhibitions of my strengths and weaknesses as a writer I mentioned above. In addition, the editing and revisions I have made to these papers, some of which are contained in this letter, provide examples of how my writing skills have improved.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
work accomplished today for essay 4
http://www.springerlink.com/content/e72pgerbv6etkn7r/
- Brief article which suggests cell phones today empower the individual to have their own small social networks and therefore take away from the larger ‘big picture’ society surrounding us
http://hfs.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/48/2/381
- Compares a drunk driver to a driver talking on a cell phone. Article concludes that impairments linked with driving while talking on a phone can be just as bad as those that relate to driving under the influence of alcohol (BAC of .08%)
http://www.bentham-open.org/pages/content.php?TOCOMMJ/2008/00000002/00000001/127TOCOMMJ.SGM
- This article discusses the effect of using a cell phone in public places. It suggests that the mere presence of a cell phone in a given area inhibits social interaction with people nearby, stranger or friend. Cell phone users are said to be less likely to offer help to those around them, and display neglect for the surrounding environment.
http://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=OCwupuLPz2kC&oi=fnd&pg=PR9&dq=social+effect+of+cell+phones&ots=O24EQE8TAX&sig=k4KJ2tFxSBt44sf4Bl5T6j1vRiM#PPA46,M1
- Very interesting article… touches on a lot of subjects dealing with informantion and communication technologies
Basically for this essay, I want to talk about modern technology, particularly cell phones, and what effect they have and what role they play in peoples lives today. How are they good, how are they bad? What does the future entail? Etc etc
- Brief article which suggests cell phones today empower the individual to have their own small social networks and therefore take away from the larger ‘big picture’ society surrounding us
http://hfs.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/48/2/381
- Compares a drunk driver to a driver talking on a cell phone. Article concludes that impairments linked with driving while talking on a phone can be just as bad as those that relate to driving under the influence of alcohol (BAC of .08%)
http://www.bentham-open.org/pages/content.php?TOCOMMJ/2008/00000002/00000001/127TOCOMMJ.SGM
- This article discusses the effect of using a cell phone in public places. It suggests that the mere presence of a cell phone in a given area inhibits social interaction with people nearby, stranger or friend. Cell phone users are said to be less likely to offer help to those around them, and display neglect for the surrounding environment.
http://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=OCwupuLPz2kC&oi=fnd&pg=PR9&dq=social+effect+of+cell+phones&ots=O24EQE8TAX&sig=k4KJ2tFxSBt44sf4Bl5T6j1vRiM#PPA46,M1
- Very interesting article… touches on a lot of subjects dealing with informantion and communication technologies
Basically for this essay, I want to talk about modern technology, particularly cell phones, and what effect they have and what role they play in peoples lives today. How are they good, how are they bad? What does the future entail? Etc etc
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Essay 3 reflection
1) What were some things that were good in essay #3?
In essay three, I think I did a good job at grabbing the reader’s attention right off the bat. In other words, I believe I did well on the ‘hook’. Although it is short, I find it to be effective because the phrase “it’s a bird, it’s a plane, no its superman” is recognized by almost everyone and the reader would not expect an essay to begin with this. Another element of my essay that I thought I exhibited good skills in was varying my sentences. I used a different sentence lengths, compound sentences, short sentences, as well as throwing in some questions here and there to keep the reader thinking.
2) What were some things that were bad in essay #3?
There were a few things I could have done better in essay three. For starts, I fell short as far as the length of my paper goes. Although I produced 5 solid-length paragraphs, the requirement was for more and I could have strained my brain for more content. Also, I think with some thought I could probably rearrange my information/paragraphs into a format that flows better. Organization tends to be one of weaknesses and that is to an extent apparent in this essay. I’m not at all saying my essay is an off the wall, hectic mess, but there’s always room for improvement.
3) What would you change in essay #3?
The main thing I would change for this essay is just to add length. I feel like the content of my paper was solid, and that the grammar, spelling, sentence structure, etc was good enough to earn a fairly good grade, but my downfall lies in the length. Other than that, a little more time spent on organizing the paper would be the only change.
In essay three, I think I did a good job at grabbing the reader’s attention right off the bat. In other words, I believe I did well on the ‘hook’. Although it is short, I find it to be effective because the phrase “it’s a bird, it’s a plane, no its superman” is recognized by almost everyone and the reader would not expect an essay to begin with this. Another element of my essay that I thought I exhibited good skills in was varying my sentences. I used a different sentence lengths, compound sentences, short sentences, as well as throwing in some questions here and there to keep the reader thinking.
2) What were some things that were bad in essay #3?
There were a few things I could have done better in essay three. For starts, I fell short as far as the length of my paper goes. Although I produced 5 solid-length paragraphs, the requirement was for more and I could have strained my brain for more content. Also, I think with some thought I could probably rearrange my information/paragraphs into a format that flows better. Organization tends to be one of weaknesses and that is to an extent apparent in this essay. I’m not at all saying my essay is an off the wall, hectic mess, but there’s always room for improvement.
3) What would you change in essay #3?
The main thing I would change for this essay is just to add length. I feel like the content of my paper was solid, and that the grammar, spelling, sentence structure, etc was good enough to earn a fairly good grade, but my downfall lies in the length. Other than that, a little more time spent on organizing the paper would be the only change.
Monday, March 2, 2009
reflective letter pre-write
-Essays for my reflective letter: #2 & #3
-Strengths shown in essay #2:
*Solid hook---grabs reader’s attention
*Paragraphs support thesis and do not stray away from it
*A conclusion that really brings my paper to a close
-Strengths shown in Essay #3
*Sentence length variation, nice mixture of long/short sentences
*Used good word choice to purvey powerful thoughts and ideas
*Once again the hook grabs attention of reader
-Weaknesses in Essay #2
*I feel I could have transitioned between paragraphs better
*Over-use of commas resulting in too long or run on sentences
Weaknesses in Essay #3
*Length of paper—short of req. by a few paragraphs.
*Organization of my thoughts and points
-Strengths shown in essay #2:
*Solid hook---grabs reader’s attention
*Paragraphs support thesis and do not stray away from it
*A conclusion that really brings my paper to a close
-Strengths shown in Essay #3
*Sentence length variation, nice mixture of long/short sentences
*Used good word choice to purvey powerful thoughts and ideas
*Once again the hook grabs attention of reader
-Weaknesses in Essay #2
*I feel I could have transitioned between paragraphs better
*Over-use of commas resulting in too long or run on sentences
Weaknesses in Essay #3
*Length of paper—short of req. by a few paragraphs.
*Organization of my thoughts and points
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